Like most Americans, I experienced the trauma of September 11, 2001, through my television. My wife, 1-year-old daughter Lauren, and I had just moved to the Cleveland, Ohio area, and I was a stay-at-home dad. That morning I was in my living room while Lauren watched a children’s show. Our landline phone rang, and my brother-in-law said: “Turn on the news.” I changed the channel over Lauren’s protest. Smoke billowed out of the first tower. Watching a national tragedy unfold in the presence of a 1-year-old made an already surreal experience even more bizarre. I was unsure what to do … [Read more...]
Bringing Children into Post-9/11 World a Bet on a Better Future
Others can give you a more riveting account of that day. What they saw. What they felt. What they smelled. Stories that are breath-taking and heartbreaking in the same sentence. Someone living out a surreal real-life action movie. Nothing extraordinary happened to me that day – Sept. 11, 2001. I was just one of the millions of spectators. But as I cut through Union Square in Manhattan on my way to St. Vincent’s Hospital in Greenwich Village to give blood, I do recall one lightning bolt of a thought flash across my mind. There is no way I’m bringing a child into this world. I was … [Read more...]
Saving for College: Educate Yourself on These 3 Main Methods
Every parent wants the best for their kids, and as a financial planner that leads to a lot of my clients asking about the best way to start saving for college. My first piece of advice is always to make sure you've built a solid financial foundation for yourself first, including getting your retirement savings on track. It's the whole “oxygen mask on the plane” philosophy. You have to stabilize yourself before you can truly help your kids. But if you've already done that and you're able to put some extra money away toward saving for college, what's the best way to get started? Three … [Read more...]
Dreams Need to Stay Alive for Parents as Well as Their Children
My wife approves of my keeping one mistress. She happily walks in on me as I’m cozying up with an Abraham Lincoln biography, a Wall Street Journal op-ed page or the latest edition of Time magazine. If she’s out of town, I’m never alone long. I'll quickly get intimate with Charles Krauthammer, Neil deGrasse Tyson or an elegantly stated case against the anti-fossil fuel argument. But only one at a time: I don’t have the stamina I used to. These late-night visits to the native English language are my after-hours escape and salvation. You see, I’m an English-language copywriter living in … [Read more...]
Watching Football with Inquisitive Daughter a Different Kind of Experience
My wife and I were recently given two tickets to an Indianapolis Colts preseason football game. Since my wife, admittedly, pays no attention during games she told me to do whatever I wanted with the tickets. After much debate, I decided to take my oldest daughter. The Colts no longer had Peyton “Nanny” as she calls him, but she was still pumped up and excited to go. We live just a couple of miles from the Lucas Oil Stadium, so it was a quick car ride downtown. I managed to find free street parking, too, and all I had to do was cross four lanes of traffic and cut off two cars to get it. From … [Read more...]
Role Model of Working Dad is Attentive, Flexible, Successful
By the time I decided to become a father, I knew the kind of dad I wanted to be. One who was present. One who there to see my daughter grow. A dad who changed diapers, took her to playgroups, did school runs, helped out in class, and was generally immersed in family life. I was lucky enough to live this as a stay-at-home dad for five years, before returning to work. I don’t know where this idea of being this kind of dad came from. It certainly wasn’t from my own father, who was far from being present, and certain wasn't my role model. I still maintain that seeing the movie Mr. Mom at a … [Read more...]
Baseball Field in the Failing Light Offers Father a Renewed View
Some of the most spiritual moments I have ever had came on a baseball field. This one came just walking past one. I walked past an empty field yesterday and it was like an old friend was waving. Inviting me to visit. Welcoming me with a warm hug. I stopped and took it all in. The sun hit the fence and the dirt just right and it was like a portal back to my childhood. For a few moments the stress of adulthood withered and the hope and promise of youth coursed through my veins as I breathed in the familiar concoction of grass and dirt and the approaching fall's breeze. All seemed … [Read more...]
Life in America: Active Shooters, Escape Plans and Lockdowns
“I could make the jump.” He was sitting across from me at a small bistro table sandwiched between walkway and railing. We were sharing a pretzel, one of us more than the other, and speaking of the things that people do while shopping for shorts on a Saturday. “I could jump to the escalator,” he reiterated against my disagreement. He mentioned his parkour training. He referenced his youth. “There are better options,” I said. We were in the same mall we always go to for back-to-school needs, having a new version of the same conversation we’ve had for years. The recent addition of … [Read more...]
School Supplies Teachers Really Want You to Buy This Year
Back-to-school time means stocking up on school supplies for your kids: notebooks, pencils, you know the gist by now. When I was a teacher there were always school supplies I wanted to add to the list we sent my students' parents, but I never could get up the courage to include. Ear Plugs During the first few days of school -- aka, the honeymoon period -- the kids are quiet and well behaved. Then reality hits. The weeks leading up to Christmas vacation and spring break are the worst and ear plugs for teachers are almost a requirement. They block out overall noise and eliminate hearing … [Read more...]
Little Library Can Have a Big Impact on Your Neighborhood
Think back to your childhood neighborhood. Beyond the memories of family and friends, what is your warmest recollection about the neighborhood itself? I was lucky enough to grow up in a neighborhood that featured two elderly women called “the Candy Lady” and “the Sucker Lady.” In elementary school, my buddies and I learned that they lived a couple of blocks away, next door to each other. Near their back doors they kept a bowl of wrapped candy and suckers, respectively, for kids to enjoy. Each time we rode our bikes to their houses, we couldn’t believe the treats were there again, like a … [Read more...]
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