Unless you or your partner plan to be a stay-at-home-parent, one of the most significant decisions you will make as a parent is who will be taking care of your child when you are at work. That's often 40-plus hours a week of a stranger raising your child. For most parents, that means picking the best daycare option you can. From my experience, as we looked for daycare for two children, several factors should be considered. Start looking for best daycare option NOW! The reality is, depending on where you live, there could a waiting list longer than 10 months to get into a daycare … [Read more...]
Black Son Helps White Dad Reflect on Being Minority in Other’s Homeland
“Dad, did you feel weird in Africa?" The question from my 12-year-old son, Yosef, caught me off guard. My face must have told him so. "You know," he continued, "because you were white?” Maybe it was because I was jet-lagged and tired of chasing my 2-year-old daughter around the gate area during our flight delay. Or, maybe it’s because I rarely think about race even though my son is black and the rest of our family is white. We adopted Yosef nearly 11 years ago from Ethiopia, and our recent trip to visit my wife's relatives in the nation of Senegal would be his first back to Africa … [Read more...]
LGBTQ Parenting: How Different is It from Just ‘Parenting’
As an openly LGBTQ parent of twins, I'm often asked, “How different is it raising your children?” Our household must be a complete contrast from our heterosexual counterparts, right? Well, I’ve put together our household routine – let’s count the differences together, shall we? Wake up and sing Every morning when the kids wake up, we sing, “Good Morning, Sun.” I take off their sleep sacks, we stretch our arms and give great morning smiles. Sometimes they go on their tummies to stretch after a long sleep in the same position. Diaper change The kids really love their diaper changes. (And … [Read more...]
Teen Daughter Approaches Crossroads of Adulthood, Childhood
It’s often described as a tightrope, but that’s not terribly accurate. There is no risk of falling off either side. This period of life, the immeasurable, undefinable, delicate space between childhood and young adulthood, is more akin to finding yourself in the middle of a meadow. It can be peaceful and pleasant but also foreboding. All depends on the direction of the wind and the light or absence thereof. The meadow in the midst of youth and growing up is a vast space between two distinctly different environments: to the left, the lush forest up ahead with flora and fauna but with less … [Read more...]
Have You Become Your Mother (or Father)? A Spring Break Tornado Story
When your 15-year-old is on spring break with another family for a week, the last click-bait you want to see on your phone is “Tornado Watch from Florida to South Carolina.” What are the odds, I fretted, as my thumbs speed-texted “U ok? Just heard about tornado watch for sarasota?” My daughter replied like King Kong casually batting away a helicopter parent: “yeah we r good.” Despite her nonchalance, shortly after her return home she admitted that my message had, in fact, alerted them to a coming storm, much to her amazement. Begrudgingly, she gave me credit for helping them take … [Read more...]
#MeToo Parenting: How Moms, Dads Can Make a Difference for All Kids
The #MeToo movement has been a game-changer in the world of entertainment, politics and business. But how can parents make it one in everyday life while raising children? And how can men participate without being accused of the dreaded "mansplaining" or fear of causing more harm than good, no matter their intentions. On the latest Modern Dads Podcast, guest host Whit Honea speaks with two powerful voices on parents’ roles in the #MeToo movement: Karen Walrond and Mike Reynolds. + Listen to our #MeToo podcast + Walrond is an author, photographer, speaker and coach. The Houston resident is … [Read more...]
Why You Can’t Get Parenting Right No Matter How Long, Hard You Try
How many times have you heard practice makes perfect? About a gazillion – right. And I find it be true for the most part. Well, I might not get to perfect, but I get way, way better. But then, there’s parenting. Next week my oldest son, BR, will turn 14. Whoa – had a stop there for a moment. That still surprises me. Anyway, that means I will have been a parent for 122,640 hours. Way more than the 10,000-hour rule. You know 10,000-hour rule, right? In Malcolm Gladwell's book Outliers, he determined it takes 10,000 hours of deliberate practice to become great at some high-level … [Read more...]
Now are the Chores of Our Discontent
The chairs in the family room are in constant use, their seats warm against the press of pants and careless give of sun-dried towels. There are two of these chairs, set just so to encourage casual conversation while still open to the glow of the fireplace, a request to the piano or whatever is sent from the kitchen. It is a cozy corner, softly lit by stylish lamps and stars of varying distance. The dogs dine there twice daily, the bar against the wall is visited somewhat more so. These chairs grow heavy beneath the weight of our day, and heavier still the following and again after that. … [Read more...]
Forgotten Homework: Do You Chose to Come to the Rescue or Teach a Lesson?
I’m sitting at my kitchen table, cleaning up breakfast dishes when I see it -- my daughter’s math notebook. There’s a sinking feeling in my stomach. You see, she’s at school right now. She left her homework at home. She can be disorganized at times, and she also gets very afraid and nervous if she doesn’t have her homework turned in on time. I could solve this problem for her and take her the homework she left behind. I’m going to be driving right by her school in a few minutes anyway. It wouldn’t be that much of an inconvenience for me. It would calm her down and make her feel way less … [Read more...]
I Want My Son to Know Judaism but I’m Not Sure I Believe Anymore?
With Passover beginning tomorrow night, I've been reflecting of late on my hard relationship with Judaism. On one hand, my identity is very much as a Jew, at least culturally. I had a bar mitzvah. I've been to Israel. I can read Hebrew (although my understanding is limited). I went to a Hebrew high school, and even taught there for two years. I know the blessings by heart, or mostly. I have Passover Seders in my house, we occasionally have Shabbat, and I can "Oy vey" and "Nu, so ..." with the best of them. I married a Jewish woman, and we stepped on the glass. And guilt? Do I know about … [Read more...]
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