Disclosure: The author has partnered with Life of Dad and Restonic Mattress for this faux political advertising promotion in which you have a chance to win a new Restonic Mattress.
My fellow American parents: Have you been asleep at the wheel?
Of course not! We’re parents and parents never get to sleep!
Unlike our children, who when they were little, seem to fall asleep everywhere except in their beds. Here’s a perfect example:
I know you know what I mean, my zzz-deprived moms and dads.
And when we finally get our kids to bed, they don’t sleep. And they certainly don’t let us sleep.
When they are babies, they wake us by crying in the middle of the night to feed them or change their diapers.
When they are toddlers, they wake us by crying out for glasses of water or just “one more story.”
And when they become tweens or tweens — oh, my sleepy American parents, they make us cry with worry.
We stay up all night fretting about their futures. At least when we aren’t finding them in the wee hours of the morning sneaking peeks at the YouTube and doing the SnapChatting when they should be getting the eight to 10 hours of daily shut-eye recommended by the National Sleep Foundation.
How can they be good at school without the proper night’s shut eye? How can we, Mr. and Mrs. American Parent, be good to them if we are not getting enough sleep? Where are we going to find the energy to play with them, to make them dinner, to drive them to the 101 activities they have scheduled.
Oh, chauffeuring the kids. That’s when our children finally do sleep — at a time we can’t!
Should we lower the driving age so we parents can catch some ZZZs in the backseat while the little ones fight traffic? Oh, heck no, my snooze-impaired constituents! Talk about creating stress-induced insomnia!
No. My fellow parents, we need to invoke our rights.
Our right to a healthy night’s sleep. A sleep where we can dream — big dreams — dare I say, the American dream!
A dream about our children picking up their own messes, doing their own laundry and treating us to ice cream instead of the other way around. Isn’t that the kind of nation our great-great grandparents signed up for at Ellis Island?
So, my people, it all starts with choice.
The choice to live the healthy sleep lifestyle. The choice to make time — at least 7 or 8 hours of it — to rest our brains and bodies. The choice to recharge ourselves so we have energy to be better parents, better employees and better — gosh, darn it, no — the GREATEST Americans EVER!
And that choice — the right choice — is by making me your Restonic Beds King of Rest.
Do I promise you a chicken in every pot? A car in every garage? Two for five and five for a quarter?
Of course not.
But I promise you that Restonic mattresses are handmade with quality materials and great attention to detail. Check out comparably priced mattresses from competitive brands and you. Will. See. The. DIFFERENCE!
I promise you that a Restonic mattress can be the foundation for an awesome night’s sleep that will benefit you and your family.
I promise you that Restonic has not donated to my Super PAC, but that they might send me a new mattress if they determine that I deserve something better than a lifetime of passing out like this:
Restonic is the supporting dreams company, and by supporting my King of Rest candidacy, that company will make my dreams come true.
God bless your good night’s sleep, and God bless these United States of Parenthood!
Enter to win a Queen-sized Restonic Mattress!
Even I don’t become King of Rest, anybody — even YOU, slacker– has the chance to win a queen-sized HealthRest® Mattress from Restonic. It’s layered with latex and TempaGel® by Restonic and supported with a Trucomfort core™, a healthy, supportive night’s sleep is yours for the taking.
- Need more great tips on how to get a good night’s snooze? Check out the Restonic Sleep Blog
- Can’t wait to get a better mattress? Find a Restonic Beds retailer near you!
I am Kevin. I want to be your King of Rest. And I approve of this message.
I have a daughter that can sleep wherever and whenever she wants -don’t I wish!!!
I need a new mattress because I wake up during the night and the next day have back pains.
My mattress is shot and consequently so is my sleep.
I need a restonic mattress because my current mattress is a bit old now and I feel like I need to rest better now that my life is getting busier.
I need it because ours is getting uncomfortable.
I need a new mattress because my current mattress has all sorts of uncomfortable lumps and bumps.
We need a new one because I suffer from chronic back pain and am only 29. Boohoo. Plus we have an old, squeaky one that just does not help that situation or the fact that I am a light sleeper. Thanks for the giveaway!
My mattress is over 30 years old and I can feel the springs beneath me which is why I need a new mattress.
Our mattress is well over 20 years old. It was passed down to us from my parents when we got married. It’s awful to sleep on. We wake up with back aches, pulled muscles and a not so good morning!
Ours is over 15 years old and just not strong anymore!
This would be so awesome. I would love a new mattress because I am currently sleeping on my Nana’s mattress which is over 15 years old.. and my Nana just passed on May 2nd 🙁
My Mattress is old and not very soft.
I Need A New Mattress Because Mine Is Uncomfortable And I’ve Had It For Many Years.
I need a new mattress because we have had the same one since we got married.
My mattress is very uncomfortable and old.