Once again I find myself sitting on my patio in the backyard, enjoying a cigar and a drink and contemplating the events of the day. The cigar is an inexpensive hand-rolled number (never ‘cheap’, always ‘inexpensive.’) and the drink is a Charles Shaw Sauvignon Blanc (cheap). The subject of my contemplation this evening?
This is my second said holiday with my twin boys and a little more meaningful than the one I had last year. The first, of course, was important because … well, it was my first. The first true Father’s Day where I was the creator of little tiny human beings that will one day look up to me. Where I was the one getting cards and well wishes from friends and family on social media instead of just being the one sending them.
I’ll be honest. I don’t remember much from those festivities. The boys were just over five months old and I think that my wife and I were so sleep deprived that you could have told me I won the lottery and I wouldn’t have been able to show any more enthusiasm … at least without a nap first.
This year I still got the cards, and the messages on Facebook, but I got something else.
My Father’s Day reflections are bright with images of spending the day with two toddlers who love me very much and show it constantly throughout the day. The mischievous smile from Gavin as he peeks out from behind one of the bright neon beach balls I found at Target the other day. Seeing the triumphant look on Carter’s face as he walks on unsure feet between the ottoman and my waiting arms. Just the extra second or two of a hug from either one of them puts me into an orbit of sheer pleasure that I didn’t know 365 days ago when I celebrated the same holiday.
As I sit here and watch them sleeping soundly on the baby monitor, I understand that I didn’t receive a handmade card made by them drawn in crayon or get to watch them hit a home run at a little league game, but what I did get was a second Father’s Day that was as special to me as the first and one that will be hard for them to top next year.
But I’m sure they will.
A version of Father’s Day Reflections first appeared on Daddy Double Trouble.