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Forgotten Homework: Come to the Rescue or Teach a Lesson?

April 2, 2018 by Pete Gilbert

math with pen forgotten homework
Forgotten homework causes one dad to make a hard decision. What would you do? (Photo: Antoine Dautry on Unsplash)

I’m sitting at my kitchen table, cleaning up breakfast dishes when I see it — my daughter’s math notebook. There’s a sinking feeling in my stomach.

You see, she’s at school right now. She left her homework at home. She can be disorganized at times, and she also gets very afraid and nervous if she doesn’t have her homework turned in on time.

I could solve this problem for her and take her the homework she left behind. I’m going to be driving right by her school in a few minutes anyway. It wouldn’t be that much of an inconvenience for me. It would calm her down and make her feel way less anxious. If I took it in, it would also keep her from getting a bad grade and possibly a lunch detention.

Ultimately it would make her very happy. It would make me feel good too. Dad to the rescue!

Like I said, I COULD solve this problem for her, but I’m not going to.

And it hurts like hell.

Forgotten homework is a teachable moment

All I want is for my kids to be happy. Yet in this situation, my daughter’s happiness is taking a backseat to what hopefully amounts to a teachable moment.

By not taking my daughter’s homework to her, she’s learning a lesson. She learns she needs to be more organized, and she needs to get her school things packed up the night before. She learns there are negative consequences to forgetting homework such as lower grades and not being able to sit with friends at lunch for a day.

Also, by not taking her homework to school, I’m not perpetuating this problem so it happens again and again. I would hate to be the parent of a middle (or high) school student that runs his or her kid’s assignment to the office because it was forgotten at home.

Chalk this up to a parent trying to do what’s best in the long-term for a child, not necessarily what’s best for her today.

How would you react to a similar situation? Curious if I’m alone on this one…

A version of “Forgotten Homework” first appeared on Indy’s Child.

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Filed Under: education, parenting advice Tagged With: homework

About Pete Gilbert

Pete Gilbert is really Brian Craig, a stay-at-home dad to three elementary-school aged kids. He has written for Indy’s Child the Magazine and Cincinnati Parent Magazine. He is also co-organizer of Indianapolis Dads Group and a sixth-grade spelling bee runner-up.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Adam G says

    April 2, 2018 at 11:44 am

    I have been exactly there. The first time I took it to him, and when he came home I warned him that I would not in the future. The next time I didn’t take it to him. There’s only been one more incident like that since.

    I did take him his lunch when I forgot to pack it into his bookbag. He’s supposed to check, but a hungry kid is ONE STEP TWO FAR.

    Reply
  2. The Autism Dada says

    April 6, 2018 at 8:17 am

    We’ve had our daughter leave her homework behind before, but as just in year 4 she doesn’t worry and takes it in the next day. I’m sure as she gets older and progresses, this may become an issue. I would think about the lesson but I’m be more worried about her loosing points in education to do that. 🙂

    Reply

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