Equal Rights Among Siblings Necessary for Better Relationship

A few months back, my oldest son had a full week of trips with his middle school. He needed lunch for these trips and asked if he could buy bacon, egg and cheese sandwiches for his trips. He’s a true New Yorker already — I love it!

I didn’t think much of it and hooked him up. My 5-year-old caught wind of this and started asking for the same thing. I told him no but also promised that when he had a school trip, we would do the same thing.

A month later, at 6:30 one morning, my 5-year-old walked up to me and said, “Dad, do you remember?”

I had no idea what he was talking about and basically kept pushing him away. It was too early to play a guessing game. Then my wife hooked me up.

She said, “He has to be like the other, he has a school trip today!”

I wiped the crust out of my eye while trying to figure out this cryptic message until it finally hit me. He wanted a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich for his trip just like his older brother had.

Lesson 1: Kids don’t forget

I told my youngest son I would get him a sandwich in hope that a month later he would forget. That didn’t work out well.

I don’t know how kids do it but they remember everything, so be mindful of what you promise or say to them because one day they will ask you about it. He loves those sandwiches, wants to be like his older brother, and only forgets the instructions I give him on the daily. In short, he can’t remember shit that I tell him but can remember when his brother gets something he also wants. Damn kids.

Lesson 2: All siblings must have equal rights

When you have kids, buying only one of them anything rarely works.

If you buy one of your kids something, the other(s) will also want something. It never fails. Sometimes it’s not the same thing, but they ALWAYS want something.

All households must have equal rights when it comes to buying things for your kids. They will remind you that big bro or big sis got something and so should he. It gets worse when it’s an older child fighting for what the younger child got.

You will be made to feel like you’re breaking the law if you don’t hook everyone up. You will be nagged and hear lines like, “But he got it, I want it.” It gets annoying but the kid is right.

A version of this first appeared on Cool4Dads.