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Masculinity Addressed Head on By At-Home Dad

April 22, 2010 by City Dads Group

Thanks to Matt S. for pointing me towards one of the best blog entries I have ever read on stay at home dads! The Stay At Home Dad PDX blog authored by Portland Dad doesn’t “skirt the issues.” Instead, in Stay At Home Dad & the Question of Masculinity, he tackles head on the extremely sensitive topic of “how a man maintains his masculinity in a role that has been defined for generations by feminine responsibility.” Portland Dad dives deeper by addressing these frequently asked questions and giving honest and concise answers: “how do you feel your masculinity has been affected by being an at-home dad; do you feel emasculated or depressed that your wife makes more money then you; and how does the response of friends and family who have made different choices affect you?”

“I in no way feel emasculated for being a stay at home dad and I know that my wife sees me as a strong man not just because I can open the pickle jar but because I can soothe a crying baby.”

What resonates most for me in his blog post is his candor and brutally honest tell-all. His insight provides dads out there that are considering taking on the role of stay-at-home dad a chance to be in Portland Dad’s shoes (for a brief time) to see if it is truly for them. He gives you some real powerful issues to mull over.

Portland Dad concludes his post like this: “Just like the stay at home moms that have had no choice but to be home with the kids, the role is going to become limiting and lead to feelings of being trapped. When you get to make the choice there is freedom and a sense of purpose in the role that I have come to love. I am a stay at home dad by choice and I wouldn’t trade this job for anything.”

I too am a stay at home dad by choice and ‘second’ his opinion – there is nothing emasculating about it & I wouldn’t trade anything for the intrinsic reward and invigorating experience received in this role!

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