“Thickly Settled.” That’s the road sign that appeared as my wife and I drove around the Massachusetts town where we had just moved our oldest child into her college dormitory. I had never seen such a sign, but my first thought was how “thickly settled” my heavy heart had been all weekend. I knew drop-off would be bittersweet, but the crowded mix of contradictory emotions that had taken up residence in me kept shifting through pride, sadness, joy and fear. Upon second thought, I realized the opposite: my heart was “thickly unsettled.” But I found the metaphor of a family as a … [Read more...]
College Search Tips for Helping You, Your High Schooler Find the Right ‘Fit’
Hear that collective sigh? That's the sound of high school seniors — and their parents — finally finishing the often years-long college search process. Fortunately, my oldest daughter recently found the right “fit,” a buzzword guidance counselors emphasize for good reason. For many, though, the process can be quite stressful. Here are five big-picture college search tips from the trenches for you and your children. College search tips No. 1: Conduct an 'I-search' before research Long before visiting campuses, encourage your son or daughter to pay attention to what interests them. How do … [Read more...]
I Don’t Care if My Kid Goes to College
Even though our oldest is only in the fourth grade, my wife and I have already started thinking about college for our kids. We’ve done the responsible thing and, a couple years ago, started a college fund for our kids, but that’s where things got tricky. My wife and I aren’t even sure we WANT our kids to go to college, at least not immediately after graduating high school. I know it’s different for everyone, but I definitely wasn’t ready for college at age 18. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, blew off many of my classes, changed my major several times, was put on … [Read more...]
Fathers of All Ages
A friend of mine from college was in town so I messaged him immediately to if he’d have time to get together. It was great seeing him again because it brought back some great memories and encouraged me about today’s young people. For the record, I feel like I’m 90 years old when I write ‘today’s young people,’ but in this context it’s true. My friend’s son is in his senior year of high school. My kids are 3 and 5. I don’t feel like an old dad, but suddenly, seeing a good friend from college talking about his life and what he does as a dad made me feel weird. Having a child forces you to … [Read more...]