It’s often described as a tightrope, but that’s not terribly accurate. There is no risk of falling off either side. This period of life, the immeasurable, undefinable, delicate space between childhood and young adulthood, is more akin to finding yourself in the middle of a meadow. It can be peaceful and pleasant but also foreboding. All depends on the direction of the wind and the light or absence thereof. The meadow in the midst of youth and growing up is a vast space between two distinctly different environments: to the left, the lush forest up ahead with flora and fauna but with less … [Read more...]
Why You Can’t Get Parenting Right No Matter How Long, Hard You Try
How many times have you heard practice makes perfect? About a gazillion – right. And I find it be true for the most part. Well, I might not get to perfect, but I get way, way better. But then, there’s parenting. Next week my oldest son, BR, will turn 14. Whoa – had a stop there for a moment. That still surprises me. Anyway, that means I will have been a parent for 122,640 hours. Way more than the 10,000-hour rule. You know 10,000-hour rule, right? In Malcolm Gladwell's book Outliers, he determined it takes 10,000 hours of deliberate practice to become great at some high-level … [Read more...]
Shoes of a Child Take Many Steps on Guided Journey Toward Adulthood
I found myself looking at this pair of shoes left in front of the sink in our bathroom last week, and I had an awful moment of enlightenment -- one of those moments when a dad is forced to realize his kids are growing up. Those shoes fit snugly on the feet of my 12-year-old son. As I stood there looking at them, I could almost see him standing there looking into the mirror. I could almost see him doing any number of the routine mundane tasks he does standing in that spot, that spot now marked by his very empty shoes. Before I knew it I was imagining him doing other tasks in front of that … [Read more...]
F*ck 40: Lifting the Midlife Fog After Milestone Birthday
The 40th birthday party my wife threw for me was legendary – the next day’s massive hangover being evidence enough. My head pounded on that first official day of my fourth decade as I trudged out of bed and began picking up the remnants of the past night’s celebration. As I emptied the second half-full beer can of the morning, I mumbled, “F*ck 40.” My tone was dismissive – as if I was saying something snide like, “I’m better than ever” or “age is just a number” or “40 is still sort of a millennial, right?” Maybe I was trying to convince myself. The hangover, though, has not gone … [Read more...]
At-Home Dad Wonders: Have My Kids Outgrown My Help?
Every year I leave town for a few days to attend a conference. In addition to my wife’s usual role “making the dough,” during these three or four days she also takes on my role: “running-the-shit-show.” While at my conference I always learn a few things, but, it never fails, I learn just as much at home once I return from my trip. For example, upon returning, my wife told me all the things my kids did for themselves without any help from her. Most of these were out of necessity as she was trying to get herself ready for work, but nonetheless my kids did them without parental assistance … [Read more...]
- 1
- 2
- 3
- …
- 11
- Next Page »