All the dads of my group gather round as one pulls out his wallet. His smile is huge and, even though he would never admit it, there is a tear in his eye as he pulls out the little photograph. “That’s just precious,” one says. “Hey, congrats man,” another says. The picture is well-worn, and you can tell that he has shown it hundreds of times in the last two days alone. To his parents, his friends, even to strangers on the street. He can’t help himself because none of us can. He’s trying to be humble but there is pride in his voice every time he talks about her. “It was a rough go … [Read more...]
Gender Gap Closure, Increased Parenting Equality Dad Goals for Shut-In
Shame on all dads if this COVID-19 shut-in doesn’t forever close the gender gap with our wives in the battle for household-related equity. Let’s admit it: While today's dads help far more around the house than our fathers did – nearly three times as much -- most still are not doing their fair share. Women in the United States spend on average of 72 minutes more a day than men doing housework and performing childcare tasks, according to the most recent U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistic data. On any given day, 22% of men reported doing housework, such as cleaning or laundry, whereas 50% of women … [Read more...]
‘Girl Dad’ Confessions: Ex-Stay-at-Home Father Reflects Beyond Hashtags
Even a few weeks after the helicopter crash in Los Angeles that killed basketball great Kobe Bryant, his daughter Gianna and seven others, the shock remains. As a parent of two teenagers, what reverberates most is the multi-generational losses of three different families. Based on the supportive messages that continue to flit across social media, fellow parents agree. The most viral hashtags, however, have celebrated the father-daughter relationship: #GirlDad and #GirlsDad. They resulted from Elle Duncan’s tearful ESPN report in which she recounted Bryant’s pride as a “Girl Dad.” When I … [Read more...]
Parents Need to Know History to Help Children Prepare for Future
One of the pleasures of being a parent of teens is the long history you can reflect on. From time’s perch, you can finally start assessing what went right as a parent. (You can also assess what went wrong, but that’s for another post.) During my younger parenting years, I had always heard that if a parent models a behavior at home, a child is very likely to adopt that behavior, eventually. As a writer and former professor, I’ve always tried to model my love of reading history as a way to counteract our increasingly context-free culture of media soundbites and tweet-size attention … [Read more...]
Mixed Gender Sleepovers: Cause for Scandal or Celebration of Diversity
My oldest is now 10. Last year, or maybe it was two years ago, he went to a sleepover birthday party as kids do. At the time, I didn't think anything of the fact that he was the only boy on the invite list. After the party ended, I forgot it had even happened. I was at another party a few months ago where the topic was "that party with the boy sleeping over." The parents were sagely nodding to each other, relieved that one girl just went for the movie and didn’t sleep over. According to the group wisdom, her parents had done well. "Uh, yeah," I finally said. "That one boy there was my … [Read more...]
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