One night recently at the dinner table, my wife said to me, “You know you’re the reason why the boys are the way they are.” While I might have hoped this was general praise for their overall wonderfulness, I think what she was referring to specifically was their petty competitiveness. As is often the case, our 4- and 6-year-old sons were enjoying their dinner with a side of brotherly bickering. School had recently started for both, and they were arguing over who had received more points from their teacher that day. Our older son’s first-grade teacher uses an app to help parents track … [Read more...]
My Kid’s Failing School: Punishment or Understanding Needed?
The timeout chair had absolute and unquestioned power in our home. Until they were 4, my kids were horrified at the thought of a timeout. But even when the timeout chair didn’t preemptively stop a temper tantrum, it still worked magic. A two-minute sentence of silence in it instantly defrayed the tension. When you got up from timeout, the slate was perfectly clean – no ill will lingered. The timeout chair had many powers, but it had no memory. I miss the timeout chair. Hell, I simply miss the threat of it persuading my little ones to behave better. Unfortunately, no such device … [Read more...]
Oh, the Many Things Your Children Will Bring Home from School
Back-to-school time brings about a plethora of emotions in children: excitement, anxiety, anticipation, fear, among countless others. Sometimes they bring those emotions home with them, or in the case of my son, Nolan, wear them on their sleeve. Those are just some of the stuff, tangible and intangible, your kid will bring home from school, along with: Germs Your school-aged kids are to blame for any family illness the majority of the time. They bring countless germs home and, unlike their toys, your kids are kind enough to share them with you and the rest of the family, especially … [Read more...]
Summer is Dead, Long Live Summer: A Back-to-School Story
According to Facebook, we are now entering the most wonderful time of the year. Soon, the entire social platform will be virtually overrun with endless photos featuring the hottest trends in back-to-school fashion, unstained and firmly pressed beneath the forced smiles of freshly scrubbed children. Next up: Pumpkin Spice Lattes. The parents, however, are not forcing anything. The reaction shots of ecstatic moms and triumphant dads celebrating the return of academia are becoming increasingly popular. School is back from summer vacation, and the carpool is a small price to pay for the end of … [Read more...]
Explaining Evolution, Creation to Little Children is a Science, Takes Faith
Science and religion are on a collision course in my household. Religion. Science. Are they independent or intertwined? How exactly do you explain the confluence of the two subjects to a 6-year-old, a 4-year-old and a 2-year-old, especially when they’re the ones who bring it up? Naturally, I explained the evolution/creation issue as well as I could, thoroughly confusing my kids in the process. The screenplay goes thusly: Scene: A father and his three kids are driving to a park in a late model SUV SIX YEAR OLD: Hey Dad, I have a question. Who were the first people? DAD: Well, … [Read more...]
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