Need a new parenting mantra? Try this: “Most things are possible when you assume problems can be solved.” That is one of the nuggets Judith Heumann provides in her recent memoir, Being Heumann: An Unrepentant Memoir of a Disability Rights Activist. I discovered Heumann while watching Crip Camp: A Disability Revolution this past summer with my teen daughters. The film is nominated for Best Documentary Feature at this year’s Oscars. In the film’s Camp Jened footage from 1971, Heumann is a young wheelchair user and camp counselor who has polio. But her skills as an activist are already … [Read more...]
About Vincent O'Keefe
Sharing Songs Among Generations Eased Family’s Pandemic Blues
The pandemic first impacted most of us when many restaurants and bars closed to indoor dining one year ago. Where I live, that shutdown occurred the day after my wife and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary at a local restaurant. We remember eating that night and thinking, “There’s no way they’ll shut down this restaurant.”We all know what happened next: a full year of pandemic family life. When I reflect on the past year, I start with gratitude. My wife and I have remained healthy and employed, and my two daughters have been able to continue school virtually with few problems. But … [Read more...]
Help Daughters Develop Strong Voices, Become Confident Women
Do you ever fear your home is too much of a haven from the “real world”? As a former stay-at-home dad of two daughters now approaching young adulthood, I sometimes wonder if our family bubble of gender equity has prepared them adequately for the larger culture’s reduced-but-still-entrenched sexism. Fortunately, What Girls Need, a new book by Marisa Porges, offers tips about how parents can serve as a bridge for their children between home and the larger world. While her tips are focused on raising daughters, many apply to raising sons as well. Her foundational advice is to help each girl … [Read more...]
Family Habits: How to Change Bad Ones and Reinforce Good Ones
Did your family make a New Year’s resolution this month? Probably not, since we tend to think of resolutions as individual endeavors. But that may be the reason so many resolutions fail, as Charles Duhigg explains in his bestselling The Power of Habit. To change a bad family habit or reinforce a good one, we first need to know how habits operate. Duhigg writes “habits emerge because the brain is constantly looking for ways to save effort ... without habit loops, our brains would shut down, overwhelmed by the minutiae of daily life.” In fact, nearly half the actions we perform each day … [Read more...]
Skating Creates Family Magic, Teaches Us About Balance in Life
My family owes a lot to ice skating. In fact, my first date with my wife of 25 years was at a festival of lights that featured outdoor skating. I still remember how we both pretended we were not good skaters so we could cling tighter to each other. I grew up in New York's Niagara Falls area right next to the Canadian border, so ice skating has always been a part of my life. When I was a child, one of my best friend's fathers created that magical oasis that cold-weather kids crave: a backyard ice rink. Looking back, the rink was quite small, but in my memories it had NHL proportions complete … [Read more...]
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