Shame on all dads if this COVID-19 shut-in doesn’t forever close the gender gap with our wives in the battle for household-related equity. Let’s admit it: While today's dads help far more around the house than our fathers did – nearly three times as much -- most still are not doing their fair share. Women in the United States spend on average of 72 minutes more a day than men doing housework and performing childcare tasks, according to the most recent U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistic data. On any given day, 22% of men reported doing housework, such as cleaning or laundry, whereas 50% of women … [Read more...]
The Racism We Gift Our Children
My 13-year-old son, Yosef, is black. I’m white. Most times, we’re too busy to take notice of the difference. Never, though, have I felt a pastier shade of white than when I talk to my son about the anecdotes of racial divide that dot the national headlines on what recently seems to be a daily basis. When President Trump calls U.S. Rep. Elijah Cummings out in the context of Baltimore crime statistics and subpar housing conditions, Yosef looks to me to make sense of people calling our commander in chief a racist, asking in confusion, “They’re saying the President is racist. What?” After … [Read more...]
Early Days with Baby for Memory Making, Not Perfect Parenting
Your daughter is precious and beautiful, little brother, and, I’m sure, the apple of your eye even after only a few hours of existence. I’m so happy for you and your lovely wife. And, without sounding like our dad, I’m damn proud of you, too. While I look at your beaming smiles and the picture of her in that tiny Chicago Bears jersey, I can’t help but think about the first days of each of my kids’ lives. The truth is, though, there isn’t much to reflect upon. You see, I just can’t seem to remember much of anything about any one of my five kids’ early days. My memories of each, regrettably, … [Read more...]
Virtual School: ‘Almost School’ or Online Lesson for the Future
Based on my parenting experience, I immediately associate the word "virtual" with meaning "almost." That there's been a diminished effort, something watered down or, very simply, done half-assed. And, to date, my inclination to disregard anything my kids say is virtual has been proven right. Virtually every time. Everett, my 5-year-old “picked up virtually all the LEGOs.” Then, after tucking him in, my bare foot steps entirely on one of those little, yellow character heads. Yosef, my oldest, said he “did virtually all of my math.” Never mind his weekly progress reports littered with … [Read more...]
My Kid’s Failing School: Punishment or Understanding Needed?
The timeout chair had absolute and unquestioned power in our home. Until they were 4, my kids were horrified at the thought of a timeout. But even when the timeout chair didn’t preemptively stop a temper tantrum, it still worked magic. A two-minute sentence of silence in it instantly defrayed the tension. When you got up from timeout, the slate was perfectly clean – no ill will lingered. The timeout chair had many powers, but it had no memory. I miss the timeout chair. Hell, I simply miss the threat of it persuading my little ones to behave better. Unfortunately, no such device … [Read more...]