My oldest started high school football practice recently, but we have talked more about his team’s pregame routine than touchdowns or tackles. Instead of X’s and O’s, Yosef and I are commiserating over whether he will kneel or stand during the national anthem. I wonder if other dads of third-string placekickers are spending time doing the same this summer. Former NFL star Colin Kaepernick, who cost himself millions of dollars and a promising football career after kneeling during the anthem, has been back in the news in recent weeks. And with the ongoing protests and marches in reaction to … [Read more...]
Work from Home Option May Be Better to Fight for than Paternity Leave
In preparing for the arrival of his first child, my brother-in-law mentioned that he planned to take advantage his company’s paternity leave program for the first six weeks of his infant’s life. “That’s great,” I assured him. Then I suggested an alternative. “I’d take a couple of days at first and some more time when your baby is doing more – like in six months, ” I said. My brother-in-law was dumbfounded, likely the same reaction you might be having as you think, Is this dad really saying paternity leave is shortsighted? I said this because I’ve come to realize this: Paternity … [Read more...]
Gender Gap Closure, Increased Parenting Equality Dad Goals for Shut-In
Shame on all dads if this COVID-19 shut-in doesn’t forever close the gender gap with our wives in the battle for household-related equity. Let’s admit it: While today's dads help far more around the house than our fathers did – nearly three times as much -- most still are not doing their fair share. Women in the United States spend on average of 72 minutes more a day than men doing housework and performing childcare tasks, according to the most recent U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistic data. On any given day, 22% of men reported doing housework, such as cleaning or laundry, whereas 50% of women … [Read more...]
The Racism We Gift Our Children
My 13-year-old son, Yosef, is black. I’m white. Most times, we’re too busy to take notice of the difference. Never, though, have I felt a pastier shade of white than when I talk to my son about the anecdotes of racial divide that dot the national headlines on what recently seems to be a daily basis. When President Trump calls U.S. Rep. Elijah Cummings out in the context of Baltimore crime statistics and subpar housing conditions, Yosef looks to me to make sense of people calling our commander in chief a racist, asking in confusion, “They’re saying the President is racist. What?” After … [Read more...]
Early Days with Baby for Memory Making, Not Perfect Parenting
Your daughter is precious and beautiful, little brother, and, I’m sure, the apple of your eye even after only a few hours of existence. I’m so happy for you and your lovely wife. And, without sounding like our dad, I’m damn proud of you, too. While I look at your beaming smiles and the picture of her in that tiny Chicago Bears jersey, I can’t help but think about the first days of each of my kids’ lives. The truth is, though, there isn’t much to reflect upon. You see, I just can’t seem to remember much of anything about any one of my five kids’ early days. My memories of each, regrettably, … [Read more...]