The timeout chair had absolute and unquestioned power in our home. Until they were 4, my kids were horrified at the thought of a timeout. But even when the timeout chair didn’t preemptively stop a temper tantrum, it still worked magic. A two-minute sentence of silence in it instantly defrayed the tension. When you got up from timeout, the slate was perfectly clean – no ill will lingered. The timeout chair had many powers, but it had no memory. I miss the timeout chair. Hell, I simply miss the threat of it persuading my little ones to behave better. Unfortunately, no such device … [Read more...]
About Tobin Walsh
Unscheduled Summer Brings Some Shame, Some Boredom, Much Joy
What are my kids doing this summer? Nothing. That’s right, nothing. We’ve signed them up for zero camps, have scheduled no play dates and, alas, have no true idea of how we might occupy four kids between the ages of 5 and 12 over the upcoming school-less months. Yes, I’ve taken note of your full summer calendars. I hear your days will be packed with baseball camp, fishing camp, STEM camp, robotics camp, the YMCA day school, soccer camp, your week at Disney and the photography class you’ve registered for. I must say, I’m a bit jealous of the action-packed days you have ahead. I’m … [Read more...]
Black Son Helps White Dad Reflect on Being Minority in Other’s Homeland
“Dad, did you feel weird in Africa?" The question from my 12-year-old son, Yosef, caught me off guard. My face must have told him so. "You know," he continued, "because you were white?” Maybe it was because I was jet-lagged and tired of chasing my 2-year-old daughter around the gate area during our flight delay. Or, maybe it’s because I rarely think about race even though my son is black and the rest of our family is white. We adopted Yosef nearly 11 years ago from Ethiopia, and our recent trip to visit my wife's relatives in the nation of Senegal would be his first back to Africa … [Read more...]
F*ck 40: Lifting the Midlife Fog After Milestone Birthday
The 40th birthday party my wife threw for me was legendary – the next day’s massive hangover being evidence enough. My head pounded on that first official day of my fourth decade as I trudged out of bed and began picking up the remnants of the past night’s celebration. As I emptied the second half-full beer can of the morning, I mumbled, “F*ck 40.” My tone was dismissive – as if I was saying something snide like, “I’m better than ever” or “age is just a number” or “40 is still sort of a millennial, right?” Maybe I was trying to convince myself. The hangover, though, has not gone … [Read more...]
Somewhere There is a Child In Need of Adoption
Editor's note: To mark the conclusion of National Adoption Awareness Month, guest columnist Tobin Walsh writes about his (and every) family's worries about such a life-changing decision. When I thought about adopting a child, my list of reasons about why I couldn’t began like this: Money Family impact Time Energy Work When we entered an adoption process close to 11 year ago, we were also too busy, too broke, too tired, too everything. But, still we did it. Our lives were forever changed. As I sit in my office today, re-reading that list, I quickly realize that … [Read more...]